It could never happen!
by Butterflywing
Summary: My nevergoingtohappen version of book three! Please R&R!
1. Black cats and unexplained dissaperances

Black cats and unexplained disappearances

Yay! This is my first Eragon fanfic! I've wanted to write one for a while, now but haven't been able to think of a good idea! Just a few things to say before the story starts,

Yes, I did write an Eragon fanfic a little while ago, but it was really bad and I deleted it, but I swear I won't delete this one!

This is sort of my never-going-to-happen version of book three

Some of the story is written through newspapers.

A lot of the characters are based off real people

Erika is slightly based off of one of my best friends because she likes phantom of the opera so much

Alieina is based off another of my best friends.

Leah is also based off one of my best friends!

So is Jennat.

One of the villains is based off my little sister. I know what you're thinking. She's not _that_ evil. I just wanted to base the villain off her.

I own nothing except my own ideas. No one can take them away from me!

Ok, now that I've wasted five inches of space, let's get started!

* * *

It was a dark night, but inside the house, nobody noticed. Night lights glimmered reassuringly in the kids' rooms and a T.V. glowed softly in the parent's room. The house was quiet, except for the sound of the tree blowing against one of the windows. It was a darkly ominous night, a dark premonition of what was to happen the next day.

When the sun rose the next morning, however, the day was the sort of day that could best be described as the sort of day people were expected to get a promotion, or get straight A's on their report card.

Not as the sort of day 28 people would be yanked out of their lives and thrust into the sort of turmoil they could never have imagined.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. The day was a normal sort of day for early spring. I woke up at five to take a shower, eat breakfast, and look for my backpack. (How was it I managed to lose my backpack every single day?)

When I walked into the sixth grade line at my school, I was feeling cheerful. I had found my backpack in only five minutes, so I had had time to watch T.V. before school. I hadn't missed the bus, and we were having our in school fun fair later that day.

As I stepped off the bus, chatting to Erika, a girl in my class about the math homework from the night before, I was feeling pretty good.

Erika was talking. "Do you think he'll take points off because I drew Erik all over the page?"

"That depends. Did you draw him dropping the chandelier on the answers again?"

"No, but I-"

Suddenly we both jumped back, screaming. A shadow black cat, lean, with matted hair, dashed past us, hackles raised.

I didn't say anything, because I knew what she was thinking.

Black cat are bad luck.

The conversation resumed its natural course.

"See," I said, "I told you I owned a copy of _the phantom of the opera _D.V.D." I took said movie out of my backpack and showed her.

"Fine, but I bet it isn't the special two disk edition…"

But we soon stopped speaking.

The black cat still weighed heavily on our minds.

After a few hours of mind numbing social studies, math, and reading, however, the black cat was the last thing on my mind. I just wanted to get to the funfair. My class was doing a play, and even though it was about the thirteen original colonies, it was better than cross-multiplication.

Finally, our teacher, Mr. Burgton, looked up at the clock and told us to line up quietly and head down to the gym, where we'd be doing the play.

Ten minutes later, we were all backstage (the 'stage' actually consisted of a sheet hung from the ceiling that blocked half the gym.) getting ready. Fortunately, I didn't have an actual part; I was just supposed to walk across the stage between scenes with signs saying what the scenes were.

I walked to the back of the stage, narrowly avoiding Charlie (Who was dressed up as the state of Virginia. Ha Ha.)

I sat down next to Alieina, Leah, and Jennat, who were in charge of rearranging scenery between scenes. Alieina was rereading Eldest, which lay open on her lap. Last year our teacher read Eragon to us, and as a result a lot of us were fans.

The play was about to start. I heard the usual scuffling by the edge of the stage as the boys argued over whom got to stand in the front, and then…

We were all sucked into another world.

NEGLIGANT TEACHER TO FACE KIDNAPPING TRIALS!

Jake F. Burgton, a sixth grade teacher at Willowbrook elementary school will come before court in one month's time to face accusations made against him by angry parents after his entire class was reported missing at 11:46 A.M. Monday, April 15. Also missing is- (Continued page 7)


	2. The plauge

The plague

What was it like? It's hard to describe what it feels like to be yanked out of your own world. Alieina probably described it best when she said 'It feels like you're being stretched in a hundred directions, and then suddenly snapping back.'

Or, as Charlie said, more simply, 'it feels awful.'

Of course, when we first landed on the hard, empty ground it was complete pandemonium. I won't bother to describe the details. Suffice to say it was loud, useless, and accomplished nothing.

The pandemonium hadn't completely died down when Leah calmly suggested we think up a plan for what to do next.

"This place, wherever it is, seems deserted. How do we know there are even other people living here? But There's a lake and river over there, and forest growing on these mountains. We could live here, at least until we find out more about this place."

It was a good idea, and even Charlie had to admit it.

We took stock of our possessions. Instead of jeans and T-shirts, we now wore foreign clothes that seemed like they wouldn't be out of place in a medieval castle. The boys wore tunics and leggings, the girls wore simple dresses.

Apart from that, we had next to nothing. Jennat, Leah, and I had all been clutching our backpacks when we had been whisked away, and Alieina still held her Eldest book…

"Wait! I know where we are!" Instantly, all talking stopped. All eyes were on me. I dashed over to Alieina and scooped up the book from her lap.

"Hey!" she protested

I rifled through it until I found what I was looking for.

A map of Alagaesia.

"Yes! Look!"

The class crowded around me as I jabbed a spot on the map. There's Woadark Lake, and the Toark River coming out of it! The mountains are the spine."

For a moment, there was utter silence, then a sharp squeal from right behind me.

Alieina, who had been sneaking up behind me holding a large rock, had been about to bash me on the head and steal her book back was now jumping in circles. "WE'RELIVINGINTHESAMEWORLDASERAGONANDSAPHIRAOHMYGODICAN'TBELEIVEITTHISISLIKEADREAMCOMETRUE**NOWICANDATEERAGON!"**

(TRANSLATION: We're living in the same world as Eragon and Saphira oh my god I can't believe it this is like a dream come true **now I can date Eragon!**)

We stared at her. She kept skipping.

The next few months were uneventful. We mainly found groups of other people and set about figuring out how to make houses. I was living with Alieina, Leah, and Jennat. But then came the plague.

It was awful. There was fever, headaches, and it felt like your bones were on fire. Almost everyone got it, and amazingly, we all survived. Sort of. Once they would recover, they would have forgotten all about or world. They spoke another language.

That might have been ok, had it not been for one highly disturbing fact.

Before, we had all been 11 or 12. Now, the age group was 11 (those who hadn't gotten the plague) to 57.

So you can imagine how awful I felt when I got it.

For three weeks I lay in bed, unable to speak or move or eat. The whole time, voices beckoned to me, calling me to forget my past, and to look towards the future.

One day, I found that I was terribly thirsty. I opened my eyes, and slowly stood from my bed. I went downstairs and took out a cup, which I dipped into a bucket filled with water from the town well.

I went back upstairs and peeked into the other's rooms. Alieina's room was empty, but in Jennet's I found Jennet and Alieina whispering to each other. They looked up at me, obviously fearful. I was one of the later ones to get the plague, so by then they knew what it did, and were scared of what I would be like.

I smiled and said, "don't worry, I didn't forget."

That was the good news of the day. I was the first person to really survive the plague, and come through with my intelligence intact. Unfortunately, the bad news was that Leah had it now, too.

Amazingly, Leah survived too. Jennet and Alieina didn't get it, so out entire house had survived.

There were no major lasting effects of the plague, except that both Leah and I learned the language, and were able to teach it to the others who hadn't had the plague.

Two boys, Charlie and Mark survived too. After Leah and I could walk without our legs giving way, we visited their house.

None of us wanted to live with any of the others 'the shadows', as we called them. But now that they were adults, we would have to find a way of providing for ourselves, or we would have to live with them.

We didn't know how to farm, and we didn't know any crafts. For a while it looked like there was no solution, but than Alieina came up with the brilliant idea of a trade post.

"The shadows can trade things for other things. We're right at the mouth of the mountain path that leads to Terim too, so there will be traders from other places coming through too."

It was a brilliant idea, and we happily took it up. We stayed where we were living wise (we lived right next door) and built a trade post. Charlie and Mark were in charge of haggling. Alieina was in charge of staying out of the way (She tended to freak people out with her frenzied shouts of MINEERAGONISMINEANDYOUCAN'THAVEHIMSTAYAWAYMWAHAHAHA!)

(Translation: Mine Eragon is mine and you can't have him stay away mwa ha ha!)

Leah and Jennet were good at sewing, embroidering, and other things of the same type, so they made those sorts of things. I hunted.

One day, while we were all at the shop, a trader on his way through from Dras-Leona came in and started a conversation with Charlie. The rest of us listened in. Many traders chose to swap rumors in the pub, where six 12-year-olds weren't allowed, so any piece of news was welcome.

"Have you heard?" he asked Charlie, "The tales they are spreading around the empire?"

"No," said Charlie, "What are they saying?"

"There are whispered tales of a new rider. Can you imagine? In three years, three eggs have hatched! First that rebel who went off to join the varden," (The man spat on the floor) "Then the king's new right-hand-man, what's his name? Murtagh, that's it! And now, a female rider!"

"Told you!" I whispered to Charlie. Earlier that week we'd had an argument over whether girls could be riders.

Soon after the man left and we were left to wonder who the new rider was.


	3. The traders come at last

The traders come at last

It was two years after this conversation that everything changed. I woke up really exited. The traders were coming today! This shouldn't have been a big deal to me, after all, traders came all year, but it was, because Alieina wouldn't shut up about these particular traders. One day I asked her why.

"Duh," she answered, "they're the only ones who are written about in Eragon!"

I rolled my eyes. And today was the day that the traders would come at last.

Around noon, we heard the sound of approaching horses, and people. Alieina rushed outside to see them, and the rest of us followed more slowly. What we saw, was Alieina staring open-mouthed at someone. I looked closer.

The face was too fine to be a man's, and he moved with a grace impossible to be human.

That's right. It was Eragon. Eragon Shadeslayer. Alieina wasn't the only one exited, but I was exited for a completely different reason. 'If Eragon is here,' I thought, 'Then Saphira must be too!' I had always held more interest in Eragon's blue-scaled companion then with the rider himself.

I would do anything to have a dragon.

I should probably mention that a year ago, Alieina made a shocking discovery. One winter's night, when she had come hunting with me, she was freezing her butt off on the mountain, and tried to light a fire.

She did not succeed.

In frustrated, she cried out (In English, we never used the Alagaesian tongue while on the mountain) Why won't this stupid fire-"

She cut herself off there, and it was obvious why.

Just as she said the word 'fire' the jumbled heap of twigs and branches roared into a bright purple fire, warmer than an ordinary fire, which instantly melted the snow a few feet in all directions, forming a ring of bare earth.

Alieina had used magic.

A month of experimenting brought us to the following conclusions.

All six of us could use magic to varying degrees. Alieina could use it best, and I was not quite so talented… the best I could do was light fires and hunt with magic.

English in our world was the same as the ancient language here

Magic makes skinning a squirrel a whole lot more fun.

Anyway, we dragged Alieina back to the shop before she made a complete fool of herself, and managed to restrain her. At least, until Eragon stepped into the shop.

Then we had no chance.

She threw herself at him, fending off all our attempts to get her off him. Finally I knocked her out with a large rock.

Eragon stepped up to the counter. I gasped. No, I was not gasping at the fact that he was walking. I was gasping because in my backpack had been a copy of Eragon. That book now lay on the counter.

I started to hurry towards it, intending to grab it and chuck it out a window or something, but Eragon had already noticed it.

He picked it up.

He looked at it.

He read the title.

He skimmed the summary at the back.

Then he said, "What is this?"

So we told him everything. Actually, Alieina did. And she really told him EVERYTHING. Our world, the books, the plague, and the shadows. And things that no one should ever have to know. Like how she has hair on her feet.

I know.

Not nice.

The next day, after the traders had left, we found a note from Alieina on her pillow. It read.

Sorry to leave,

But I'm going after Eragon!

I'm going to travel with the traders in hopes of meeting Eragon again.

See you same time next year!

You'd have thought that we'd now had enough adventure for a life time. But we hadn't. We still had to…

Figure out how to make the shadows remember,

Get back to our own world, and

Get Alieina back.


	4. Footprints in the snow

Footprints in the snow

A year passed. The traders had come for their annual visit, and were gone again. What worried me was that Alieina was not with them. Had she died? Had she found a way to go back to out world?

I was out hunting, in the mountains as usual. It was near the place where Alieina had first used magic. There was the spot where the fire had been. The ground around it was still clear of snow, a lasting reminder of Alieina's power.

I walked a few more feet and stopped. There stood a dragon. Like I said before, I would do anything for a dragon. But I was not at all happy to see this particular one. It was Thorn.

That meant Murtagh must be nearby.

I probably had nothing to worry about. After all, why would Murtagh care about a bunch of 16-year-olds just old enough to be allowed into the pub for the first time last Monday?

We had stopped reading the Eragon books in public after the disastrous day when Eragon had happened to see it.

Just then, I felt Jennet's presence touch my mind.

"Help! Murtagh's here and-"

That was as far as she got. With a sick feeling, I knew that something was wrong. I hurried back into town, (I forgot to mention that it had been named Dre Une) I now had something to worry about.

The entire town was ablaze. It seemed deserted. The shadows must have run out when they first saw smoke, and my friends…

I hurried into the store, which wasn't burning that badly yet. Inside, I grabbed the backpacks (still intact and hidden under the counter) and was about to leave, when I heard a groan. It was Leah.

I knelt down beside her and shook her roughly. "Le, wake up, we have to go, now!"

She opened her eyes, saw the fire burning. With evident difficulty, she stood, and I helped her hobble out of town.

The town. After the fire had been put out, barely anything was left. A few charred remains of houses were still standing, and the well had survived, but that was it. Even the fields surrounding the town were ruined. There was no where else to go.

I took Leah up to the mountain. No one else liked to go up there, so it was safe to assume we wouldn't be interrupted. Just to be safe, we spoke in English.

"What happened? I asked, "Jennet said Murtagh"-

"Murtagh came into the shop while you were out. Don't know why, but it seemed like he _knew _there was something different about us!"

"How could he know?"

"Well… Mark and Charlie were talking about cars."

"That would explain it."

"Well he just started threatening us, and then he said 'is anyone else here?' And I was in the back, so I didn't say anything, but the others all said no, then I don't really know what happened next, I think he must have used magic, and then he just left. Then I noticed the butcher next door was on fire, and I ran out into the main room and the others were gone!"

Suddenly I gasped.

"What- oh. That's bad."

Murtagh was coming back. Far, far, above, the distant shape of a dragon was soaring, round and round in little circles, Circles that were becoming bigger and bigger. Or maybe the dragon was just coming closer.

It was the latter. Soon, the dragon landed, but it wasn't Thorn. It was Saphira!

On her back was Eragon.

He looked at us, and asked us if we had happened to have seen Murtagh anywhere.

I politely explained that he had just kidnapped three of my best friends, almost killed another, and burned down an entire village.

Eragon fainted. How unexpected.

When he came to, he told us that he had been following Murtagh but had lost track of him just before our village.

"Will you help us rescue them?" I asked him.

"Rescue them!" Leah and Eragon asked at once.

"Oh no!" said Leah. "I'm going somewhere quiet where I can raise horses! I've had enough of adventures!"

Eragon said, "Are you crazy! Murtagh probably took them to his castle! There's no way we can get them back!"

I blinked. "What?" They had both spoken at the same time at high speed. You can't blame me for being a little confused.

After they had repeated themselves, I threatened to go by myself. Leah said she was still raising horses. Eragon said he'd tie me to a tree.

I hate trees.

Leah says they're out to get me.

I have no idea why.

Anyway, all looked hopeless, when Saphira butted in.

"_I agree with her."_

"_What!" _(Guess who that was)

"_Did you not go after the Razac after they killed your uncle? Were the odds not much, much worse than? And hasn't she got more reason for revenge then you did?" True, the razzac killed your uncle, but Murtagh has destroyed her entire life, not once but twice."_

"_Twice?"_

"_Once at the village, and almost certainly it was either him or Gallbatorix who brought them out of their own world."_

It took a little longer, but finally Saphira convinced Eragon to go with me. Leah still said she wanted to raise horses.

But Eragon was coming, and that was pretty cool (Alieina would _die _if she knew who would be my traveling companion!)

I might not have mentioned this yet, so I'll say it just in case.

I LOVE dragons.

Especially the persuasive kind.

But before we left, there was one thing I had to do.

Thank goodness I had managed to save my backpack.

Thank goodness there was a certain DVD inside.


	5. By the river

The phantom saves the shadows

Hello people! I just want to mention here that I know this isn't that good of a story… If you don't like it so far, you probably won't like the rest.

* * *

I hurried back to the stack of backpacks and grabbed mine. Unzipping the main compartment, I felt around inside until I felt a hard rectangularish object. I pulled it out.

It was the phantom of the opera.

Now, I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but Erika Loves the Phantom of the opera. Her real name isn't even Erika!

If there's one thing that would make Erika remember everything, its Ph.O.T.O. Taking the D.V.D. out of my backpack I called to Leah that I'd be back in a minute, and hurried down the mountain, arriving in town about an hour later (We weren't at the top of the mountain or it would have taken way longer)

At the edges of the burned heap of sticks that used to be a town, small groups of people were sleeping under the stars. I crept over to where she was asleep and put the D.V.D. where she was sure to see it when she woke up.

The next morning, we set off on our separate journeys. Leah went west, towards Terim, where she could buy some horses. Eragon, Saphira, and I went East, Towards the Ramr River.

Naturally, she didn't know it, but the phantom had had the desired effect. Obviously, twenty some kids on foot could not travel as fast as a dragon, even one carrying two humans, but the shadows were close behind… and not shadows anymore.

By the time they reached the Ramr River a few days later, I was starting to get very nervous about what we would do when we reached Urubaen, But when Saphira landed by the river, a pleasant surprise was waiting for us.

Alieina!

* * *

Oh my god… I don't think I've ever written a chapter this short! I swear this is the last short one I'll do… Probably… Just kidding! Anyway, that's all for now! 


	6. A roving band of assaisian theives

A roving band of assasin-theivs

"What are you doing here?" I cried, running up to Alieina.

"Well, I got bored with the traders, so I joined a roving band of assassin thieves!"

I stared at her. "Could you repeat that, please?"

"A roving band of assassin thieves," she cried enthusiastically.

"That's what I thought you said," I muttered.

Just then Eragon walked up behind me.

OHMYGODITSERAGONTHATSITIMNOTSTAYINGWITHTHESESTUPIDWHATEVERTHEYRECALLEDANYMORE!

"Bye, guys," she called to the group of twenty or so assassins who had crept up behind her. "I've got some fun memories with you, but I think it's time to move on."

The Assassins left.

"Hey, look," I called, "There's a whole band f people coming this way!"

"Could it be…?"

Eragon, who had much better eyesight than ether of us (Read eldest if you don't know why), said, It's about twenty or thirty kids, around the same age as you.

I looked at Alieina.

Alieina looked at me.

"Could it be…?"

"I just said that!"

"Sorry."

About an hour later, the band came into view.

It.

Was.

Them.

Go Phantom of the opera!

After they finally got to where we were, we explained that we were going after the three Murtagh kidnapped, and they asked if they could come with, and Eragon said it would probably be a good idea.

Well, actually, he said, "I- gah! Get off me! Think it's a g- OW! That hurts! Good idea! Ow! Get off my neck!"

I sighed and pulled Alieina off his neck.

Obviously, we couldn't ride Saphira when there were so many of us. Eragon, Alieina, I, and Erika (Who used to be Alieina's best friend) came with him first. The others followed more slowly.

Eragon said it would take four days to get to Uru Baen from where we were. On the third day we came to the spot where we would have to cross the Ramr River. The water was wide, brown, and fast flowing. And, as we found out when Alieina fell in and nearly drowned, very, very deep. Saphira dived under and came up reporting that it was so deep that she could stand on the bottom without her head touching the surface.

Crossing was going to be tough, and to complicate matters, just as we were deciding that the best was to cross would be to ride over on Saphira one by one, Erika spotted another dragon circling in the sky.

"It's Thorn!" I whispered.

"No," said Eragon, "it's too small for Thorn. It might be… The whole time I was following Murtagh, there was another rider following me. A girl, I think. She has a yellow dragon, who can't be more than a couple of years old.

We'd all heard rumors about the new rider, of course, but a rumor is just that- a rumor, a piece of unverified information of uncertain origin usually spread by word of mouth. Seeing the rider for real was a whole 'nother Ball Park.

And just then, the dragon dived.

There was no place to go except into the river. We crouched in the water, hidden by its murky depths while a short figure wearing armor got off a yellow dragon, looked around, then, with a snort of disgust, walked back to her dragon and took off.

"That was a close call!" Alieina cried, once we had surfaced. "But at least now we're on the other side of the river."

"True," I said, "Now all we have to do is get to Uru Baen."


	7. Rescue and time change

Rescue and time change

It wasn't easy to get into Uru Baen. It involved fake beards, shoe polish, and an eyebrow remover. Finding Gallbitorix's castle, on the other hand, was simple. It was the largest building around.

Getting in, too, was easy. Gallbitorix might live in the middle of a war camp, but he obviously enjoyed the finer things things in life. A steady stream of jugglers, magicians, midgets, fat dudes, and carpet salesmen were making their way in and out of the castle.

They disguised themselves as pastry makers and were soon within the palace.

"Now, this is where our job gets difficult," Eragon said as they shuffled into the kitchen.

"And why is that, my honey bunch of heaven?" asked Alieina.

Eragon gritted his teeth and replied, because, my annoying little fan-girl of utter HATRED, Gallbitorix has probably hidden them.

"No, he hasn't," said Erika, "he put them in dungeon #5,712,956,105, in the north-east corner of the castle."

"And you know that how…?"

She smiled. "It's amazing how much the kitchen girls here know."

That night, after pretty much everyone was asleep, we (Alieina, Eragon, Erika, and me) crept down to the dudgeon to find…

Mark, Charlie, and Jennet, obviously.

A green stone with white veins running across it.

And Leah.

Eragon went to untie Mark, Charlie, and Jennet, and began untying them.

Erika meandered over to the stone and began to examine it.

Alieina jumped at Eragon's leg.

I rushed over to Leah. "Le! How'd you get here?"

"One of Gallbitorix's soldiers arrested me, because they thought I was stealing horses, WHICH I DID NOT! Then I almost got away, but I crashed into Murtagh and kicked him, so now I'm in the high security prison."

"It's not very secure. We walked right in."

"Well, that's because it's only the high security prison on Sunday- Friday. On Saturday it's just a room with a dragon egg in it."

I helped her to her feet, and then she yelled "FREETHEHORSIESFROMHORSIEPRISON!ENDTHESUFURING!FREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSEISFREETHEHORSIESFREETHEHORSIES-"

(Free the horsies from horsie prison! End the suffering! Free the horsies! (Repeat))

Then she ran at a wall and crashed into it. Through the hole came the sound of neighing.

Several hours later, we were just about to leave, when…

"We're missing Alieina!"

"And Erika!"

"And Leah!"

Erika ran up. "Here I am! Look, I have a dragon! The egg hatched!"

"But there are only supposed to be 3 eggs!"

"Oh well, we'll figure it out later! Where are Leah and Alieina?"

Leah ran up with about 1,347,408,357,561,058,156 horses.

"Here I am!"

Alieina ran up.

"GUESSWHATIWASINTHELIBRARYANDIFOUNDSOMEFUNNYWORDSIWILLSAYTHEMNOW!"

Five seconds later, we were somewhere else entirely- our own world. There was only one problem. Ok, there were several.

The horses were still with us

So was Eragon.

("Yay!"Cried Alieina.)

Somehow the Varden were too.

And it was two YEARS before the day we had left.

* * *

yay! Now we get to the good part! Until next time, then!


	8. Words

"Wow my gosh! We're back! I'm going to say the words again!" Alieina cried. She repeated the words that had taken us into our world. Nothing happened.

"Oh, nothing happened," Eragon cried, "why is nothing happening!"

"Maybe you have to use Alagaesian language, since the ancient language there is a normal language in our world, maybe in our world, the ancient language is a normal language in Alagaesia." Alieina mused.

"Wow that actually sounded intelligent."

"Thank you! Hey! You sound surprised!"

She repeated the words, this time in Alagasia-speak.

"Hey, it worked!" exclaimed Eragon.

"But I want to go home!" Leah protested. "Say the words again."

"Um… uh… I can't remember them…"

"You're an IDIOT"

"Hey don't call her an idiot!"

"Eragon, you really do love me!"

"You're not an idiot- you're a stupid over-obsessed fangirl with an unfortunate tendency towards attacking me!"

"Oh… So do you want to go out with me?"

"IDIOT!"

Now, if two normal people were having this argument, it would no doubt soon be over. But, unfortunately, Alieina was one of the people arguing. By the time she finished, SIX FREAKING MONTHS LATER um… it was six freaking months later. But, even a total freak cannot keep arguing forever, so, eventually…

"So how does Friday sound to you?"

"I've told you 51,313,569,801,516,518,024,356,134,068 times, I.

DO.

NOT.

WANT.

TO.

GO.

OUT.

WITH.

YOU!

"So, Friday it i- hey! I just remembered the spell!"

"Yay!"

Three seconds later…

"Hmmm… this place seems framiliar…"

"it's our old school!"

"Oh, yea! I've been wanting to do this since Kindergarten," Alieina said, "Jierda!"

Instantly, the school splet down the middle, and toppled to two sides.

"I always said it was too top heavy!"

"Oh my gosh!"

"It's the yellow dragon!"

"Yes!" cried the yellow dragon.

I frowned. Something seemed wrong here…

She smiled a terrible smile, and-

XxXxXxXxXxXx Now, I forgot to mention that their school was located right under a high cliff.xXxXxXxXxXxX

She pointed at Erika and her dragon. "Ganga aptr!" They flew backwards, colliding painfully with the cliff- immediately; several rocks fell from the top, burying Erika and her dragon.

She smiled again. "Attack!"


	9. The final battle begins

Wow… yea… Ok, before I write this chapter I have to say three things. One- Wow. I just looked at the reviews for the last few chapters. I didn't realize people thought it was that good! I think it's kind of stupid, myself, which is why I haven't been writing. Two- ok, I really slacked off writing this story after school ended, mainly because there's no one to bug me about writing it. Three- I don't own Christopher Paolini's stories. Or pies.

* * *

The principal of the school (along with the vice-principal, librarian, and some other random staff members that I really don't care about) "What the HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING! WHERE DID YOU GET A DRAGON! WHAT ARE YOU- oh my god… a dragon.

As we pulled and lugged the unconscious principal, three problems came to mind.

"Guys? Where's Eragon?"

"Alieina kidnapped him," Leah answered.

"Well, why isn't the other rider attacking us?"

"She's over there, doing- oh, she's conjuring an army from thin air."

"Why does she look so… old?"

"Not that old. No older than me or you."

"But she wasn't that old when we saw him by the Ramr River was she?"

"Must have been. How could she just get way older overnight?"

"I don't know."

Just then Eragon staggered back up to us, with his clothes torn and his eyes bloodshot. He was panting, and from far away came the sound of howling and unintelligible babbling.

"I… just… got away… from… Alieina."

Then he saw the size of the army the mystery rider had formed, and fainted.

Nasuada took control, since; after all, she was in charge of the varden (who were still with us, despite being bored out of their minds during Eragon's and Alieina's five-month argument.). She sent an envoy over to the rider, who sent him back with the news that we were going to fight. When Nasuada sent the envoy back to ask WHY we were going to fight, the rider's reply was simple.

"Because we are going to attack you, and no doubt you will try to defend yourselves. Or do you prefer to surrender?"

Nasuada said she most certainly did not. Three house later, a trumpet was sounded, and the rider's army (A.k.a. Gallbitorix's army, the mystery rider was working for him; we could tell because he was standing in a tent heavily guarded by magic… and pie. Nothing puts a possible attacker off their stride more than a pie in the face) Attacked. The final battle had begun.


	10. Family ties

Don't own anything you recognize.

* * *

The words 'the final battle had begun' might sound all dramatic and stuff, but it really wasn't. Do you know what happened? Someone threw a pie, a flock of birds flew overhead (and dropped quite a bit of dung, unfortunately… rather smelly dung, might I add.) and it started to rain.

Pretty soon, though, the battle had begun in earnest. Magic flew in all directions like multicolored bolts of lightning. The clash of swords was punctuated with cries and shouts from both armies, and the occasional roar of the rider's dragon.

I was fighting just beneath the cliff, and had been basically scratched up and knocked about pretty badly. In a momentary lull in the battle, I saw the yellow dragon and its rider land on the top of the cliff, which was empty except for them. The rider was limping, and a thick line of blood ran down from a large slash in her armor.

The rider was clearly in pain, and her dragon didn't seem to be feeling that well, and her dragon didn't seem to be doing that well, either.

It would take her but a minute to heal herself and her dragon, and then the two of them would be able to return to the battle.

But if I could get up there before she could finish the healing…

A pecan pie fell just short of me, splattering assorted pie stuff over my feet. God, I hate those pies!

Summoning the magic, I said (A/N: Don't know which ancient language word to use here! Just know she got to the top of the cliff) and within moments was atop the cliff. But I was moments too late. The rider had healed herself and her dragon. She had assumed a ready position, sword held in a ready position, several differently flavored pies hovering in the air just behind her, supported by magic.

Dismay swept over me. I knew I couldn't fight a trained swordsman. Her sword was magnificently made, and mine was a 'mass produced' sword, half red with rust, and only half as big as hers.

Up close, it was also easy to tell that she was unavoidably… taller? Older? Than the last time I'd seen her.

I didn't have time to figure out what was up with her, though, because at that moment, she leaped towards me. I managed to parry her first blow, but I'd never fought with a sword before, or anything else, for that matter, and on her second blow, she knocked my weapon right out of my hand.

I saw my life flash before my eyes. I fully expected a sword to come down on my head at any moment. But it didn't. Instead, the rider said, "Good. Now we can talk."

HUH!

The voice seemed somewhat familiar. A nagging suspicion began to form in the back of my mind.

The rider took of her helm, revealing her face. Which I recognized at once, though the last time I'd seen it had been several years ago.

Just then, the loose rubble at the bottom of the cliff shook, and ERIKA burst forth. Astride her dragon, another 'mass produced' sword held in her hand (Which she couldn't use any better than I could use mine, by the way).

Her dragon flew high, and then swooped down towards the other rider, her intent deadly clear.

"STOP!" I cried. "That's my sister!"

* * *

Cries The next chapter is the last one! I can't beleive it! I've been planning this story since last Winter! Well, that's all for now! Happy 4th to everyone in the U. S. by the way. 


End file.
